Subscribe
Previous Post
I just read an article called “8 Tips For Renewing Your Relationship This Valentine’s Day” by couples therapist and educator Marty Babits, LCSW, BCD. Babits wrote a relationship advice book “The Power of The Middle Ground: A Couple’s Guide to Renewing Your Relationship” that is actually top on my list of relationship books to read right now. Ideas about balance and adaptation are the underlying 
themes throughout all of my articles about relationships, so I’m looking forward to finding out what this professional has to say about couples finding a middle ground.
In Babits’ 8 Tips, I picked out my favorites that offer sweet and easy ideas that just ask you to take a few moments to look inside yourself and think about the feelings you have for your partner. Valentine’s Day might seem cheesy and silly, but if it’s the one time of year that you really force yourself to express yourself and get in touch with your relationship feelings, then it could be a very emotional and beneficial experience for your relationship.
Tip #1: Pick at lease three qualities about your partner that you love. Gift each one of these with something special. Examples: give her a CD by her favorite recording artist in celebration of whatever you consider to be her (or his) most appealing facial feature. Choose a clothing accessory that includes the color that you think best flatters your partner and celebrate the way they look in that color. Focus on the thought over the gift. If you can’t come up with gifts to match the qualities, then just find a special way to share the qualities that you have chosen.
Tip #2: Look your partner in the eye and tell them three things that you love about them. This sounds so simple, but if you were on the receiving end of this I truly feel that it would touch you emotionally and strengthen the bond between you and your partner. (This would be a tearjerker for me…)
Tip #3: Think about something that you and your partner have had trouble coming to terms with in the past year. Give a commitment to improve your own ability to speak about the topic without blaming them. Tell your partner that you are going to accentuate understanding the issue from their point of view and that you are hoping to have fewer hurtful arguments this coming year. Arguments that come up again and again are tough and can make you doubt your ability to ever move forward. Recognize how important it is to put in extra effort in these areas.
You can find out more about Marty Babits and the “The Power of the Middle Ground” at www.powerofthemiddleground.com. I’ll post a review of the book when I read it!
Image: sxc.hu
