At the weekend I went over to Mum’s and part of every visit is to cut her grass. After Dad died, Mum started to get a little Robin visiting her house and she honestly believes that he represents Dad looking after her. This week has been difficult for me in several ways and when I was cutting the grass I had a few tears in my eyes from a feeling of loneliness.
Just as the tears welled, the robin appeared and for the rest of the time I was cutting the grass it stayed within a metre or two of me. Maybe, just maybe it is Dad looking after his little girl…I miss Dad so much, I don’t believe I have ever been quite the same since his death for many complex reasons.
The robin brought me such comfort…..have you stories of similar happenings since your grief?
P.S I have just realised it is Fathers Day this weekend…how apt!
Deb – it is strange how losing a parent feels. You are right that it is different, and in some ways I struggle with it more. I know that sounds weird but Dad would have been great at being the shoulder to cry on and the grief is worse because I haven’t got him…which means I miss him more..don’t know if that makes sense but I went out and bought a fridge magnet that was a robin today so that I felt he was with me :~)
I agree with you on the better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all…it is that love that makes me the person that I am and it is the happiness we shared that has made my life so good.
Thanks Deb
Anna, I am so happy that you have found a “connection” to your dad and wanted you to know I understand the void and pain of missing him. My dad has been gone almost 19 years and yet I think of him every day, it is a different pain and void than that for Dave but still very real and we were so close. I shared many times with my dad that were very special and many were outside so I often relate fireflies in the Spring and sunsets always with my time with him, always brings a smile to my face. We are lucky to have had such wonderful relationships in our lives, very painful to loose them but it is a better choice to have had them, I keep telling myself that when I am really sad!
Deb