Subscribe
Previous Post
I recently had a conversation that went something like this:
Friend: How’s it going? Are you still super-stressed?
Me: I’m good. I’ve been working on finding my calm from within.
Friend: Uh-huh. I think you’re finding your calm from within your vagina.
My friend was teasing me about a new guy, but she wasn’t the first person to comment on how I’m a little calmer when I’m getting laid. The problem is, I’m not always getting laid. And not to be presumptuous, but I’m pretty sure you’re not getting laid all the time, either.
So what to do while you’re waiting for your next “O”? Here are 10 things we engage in to emulate the afterglow, and why they’re almost as good as the real thing:
1. Masturbate – It’s as close as you can get to the real deal. (If you’re feeling uninventive, here are some options.)
2. Eat – There’s a reason that Ben & Jerry’s + Single Women = the Ultimate Cliché. Eating certain foods, especially chocolate, releases mood-enhancing chemicals and neurotransmitters, including dopamine, which stimulate the pleasure center of the brain, and emulate the chemical response to orgasm.
3. Get A Massage – Who can argue with the benefits of human touch and deep relaxation? Aside from feeling great, studies show that massage stimulates a release of endorphins. Get thee to a spa, haste, post-haste.
4. Do Yoga – Yoga stimulates the production of endorphins, dopamine, and serotonin, and when you finally do get laid, many say that better sex is a benefit of regular asanas.
5. Exercise – By now, everyone knows that getting to the gym gives you an endorphin-rush, making exercise a boon to celibates everywhere.
6. Get Acupuncture – We go under the needles to solve a myriad of health problems, but pleasant side effects of the eastern medicine practice are increased relaxation and – you guessed it – endorphin production.
7. Meditate – Meditation is another endorphin-booster, and several studies show that regular meditation improves mood and mental clarity, while lowering stress.
8. Drink Booze – A girl’s night out is fun and helps you release tension, but there may also be a scientific reason that we reach for the bottle when we’re not having sex: Studies show that small amounts of alcohol increase sexual desire, but heavy consumption decreases it.
9. Smell the Flowers – Certain scents actually have psychological and chemical benefits: Get an aromatherapy candle for those lonely nights.
10. Sleep – If there’s one thing to be said for not having sex, it’s that you’re left with more hours to snooze. Which is better? We’re not sure, but take advantage while you can. Eventually, we hope to find the right balance between precious sex and (sometimes even more precious) sleep.
