A lovely thing happened this weekend as I worked my butt off: I met, quote by accident, a woman thinking about becoming a mother. A single mother. Of her own, positive choosing. But even as she whispered this to me, her hand half covering her mouth, she blurted out, “But how do you do it?”
She made me smile, this lovely,waif-like woman whose profession has already prepared her mentally for the job of single motherhood. She’s a freelancer.
“You just do it,” I smiled. “And you do what your job has already made you good at: you ask for help. And you accept help, whenever it is needed.”
We chatted for a while and I urged her to look up Mikki Morrisette for support and guidance, and wished her luck. And told her to go for it, and as she had herself mentioned, don’t wait for the right man to come along.
I’ll be here to cheer her on. So will all of you.
[...] week I uploaded a drive-by post about running into a woman considering becoming a single mother by choice at a summit we were both attending. Because it was a Blackberry post, and because I’ve been [...]
Hey, BigLittleWolf, you are right. I always urge mothers everywhere to create their own tribe, however they may. I couldn’t have done this without all the women who keep me strong.
It takes family, friends, a support network – and some luck – under the best of circumstances, even with a father in the picture. Solo parenting is brutally hard without friends, family, a support network – or when all of that disappears. I cannot imagine my world without my sons – or this world without them. But I would not have chosen to do it alone.
You’re right–how do we do it? We just do. Some days are easier than others, but all my days are filled at least some moments of pure joy from having my children around.
Lara (SMC to 2 under 3!)
Lara, thank you for commenting! I’m glad you find such joy.